I always ask him how I look.
Not because I’m fishing for compliments,
but because at some point time has taught me
I’ll be deemed Too Much:
The pink hair.
The gold cowboy boots.
The day sequins — sometimes three layers deep —
and those pom pom pieces from the kids’ department.
The long glances and dazed waves from small children
caught in a web of shock that such a grown-up exists;
the derisive looks from people who can’t believe such a human
is allowed to breathe their air.
I still can’t believe I can be this big and get bigger
when I spent so much time trying to be smaller and smaller.
I desperately wanted the orange plaid couch
and agreed to the grey one —
this tells you everything you need to know
about the Compromising Decade of my life —
until one day, the pain of turning it down was too much.
I couldn’t get any smaller,
so I left the person I used to be
I’ve been Brave ever since.
If you’ve ever dimmed the sound of your own voice for so long that you can’t hear it even when you go listening…hi.
If you’ve ever been deemed Too Much and tried (and tried and tried) to tone yourself down but it hurts to be so small…ahoy there.
If you’ve given up on yourself or the world around you — incrementally or all at once — but life hasn’t improved as a result of the walls you’ve made…welcome.
Maybe it’s time for you to be Brave, too.
Brave is a workshop for ushering in the next phase of your life.
It’s for beginning to be bold in every area of your existence, in everything from your big-deal-top-shelf goals to your e-mail inbox and your fashion choices. (Fear not! You won’t leave with pink hair, just a better sense of your soul’s desires and how they play out in your day-to-day life.)
We’ll be eight kinds of Brave together.
This is the first, hardest kind of bravery: saying “no” to everything that takes up emotional or physical space but doesn’t light you up (read: Donald Trump’s Twitter feed). We’ll fine-tune your choices regarding what to let into and keep out of your life, clearing out the no-longer-great debris of daily life.
What if you were relentless about picking the friends, family members, and/or clients you let into your life? What if you unfollowed, unsubscribed, and ignored every message, product, and person that doesn’t make your heart whisper, “Fuck yah”…?
Your brain tells you it’s easier to shut down and blend in than to risk being ‘too much.’ Whether you’re too feelings-y, too soft, too loud, too wordy, too quiet, or too weird, letting yourself BE yourself on a regular basis ensures success in all the other brave arenas. In practical terms, that means you’ll wear the unicorn hat or make more time for silly dancing or ask your peeps to play with you on a new project instead of assuming they’ll hate it. (Shown: that time I suggested pudding wrestling.)
What if you let yourself out to play instead of finding new and shiny ways to hide? What if you treated yourself as if you actually matter instead of settling for second best or ‘okay’ or ‘that’ll do’ in your life?
We all have moments when we feel one thing and pretend we’re feeling another, quick to hide our true emotions behind a muttered, “I’m fine.” (I totally believe you, by the way. VERY convincing.) We all build walls — some fences, some castle-level fortresses armed with angry goats — and we can all use some practice in taking them down.
What if you told the truth — to yourself, to your loved ones, and even to strangers on the internet whom you’ve never met? What if you let yourself feel everything?
When peeps meet me, the best thing they can say is, “You’re exactly like I imagined!”– because it means I’m accurately conveying who I am in my everyday communications and in my writing. You can do that, too. You don’t have to share your top shelf secrets right away, but you can tell people what you’re reading, what you’re obsessed with, and when you’ll be attending karaoke or Quidditch practice or that live screening of Rocky Horror.
What if you expressed exactly who you are and what you believe to the world at large?
There’s a point in every daydream when Reality-with-a-capital-R comes smacking its way in and shuts down what you want because it’s ‘impractical,’ ‘too expensive,’ ‘too time-consuming,’ or ‘too hard.’ Your brain makes it exhausting to imagine a world in which there are no troubles, doubts, horrors, or accidents, since it specializes in doom and gloom.
(It promises there is no world in which people will pay you to attend a workshop in Costa Rica and have a holi powder battle in their bathing suits — as shown.)
But what if.
What if it could go perfectly? (Whatever IT is, whether an upcoming event or a relationship, a business issue or a career obstacle?) How would it go?
Vulnerability is our most accurate measure of courage — says Brene Brown and her decades of research — so we’ll be vulnerable together, too. We’ll complete a variety of exercises that will be both wildly uncomfortable and exquisitely beautiful, often in the same breath. You’ll remember that genuine human connection doesn’t require a 10-step formula or a shit-ton of effort, only a willingness to be seen by another human.
What would you do if you stopped believing you were broken? Who would you be if you let yourself be SEEN?
Finally, we’ll be calendar-brave.
It’s thrilling and lovely to be courageous in a contained environment for a few days, but how do your newfound insights translate into your everyday life? We’ll work your new ideas and insights into your calendar in both everyday ways (i.e. drink more water) and big ways, too (i.e. let Kristen know you finished that book proposal by April 1st at Noon).
What if you layered in travel and projects and those small, quiet things that call “FUCK YAH” to you instead of slathering on obligation and resentment?
A one-on-one call with me in the weeks after Brave is included with your ticket! I’ll personally make sure your lingering questions are answered and that you’re making progress on the Courageous AF front.
YAH BUT WHAT DOES A DAY AT THE WORKSHOP LOOK LIKE?
We’ll start each morning with lectures, hotseats, and Q+A. Each of those elements are intense — and it’s easy for intense to become heavy and exhausting — so my crew and I balance the day with light and playful activities. You’ll be up and moving when we do partnered activities, play a few games, and enjoy a dance break as the day progresses. (I’ve got a magnificent DJ to help out on this front.)
Lunch is available from bunches of places within a few blocks of the venue, and we’ll wrap early enough for you to hit the beach before the sun goes down. Come prepared to go with the flow and to be parted from your dearly beloved smartphone, as they’ll be collected so you’re distraction-free each day.
A few weeks after the workshop, you’ll have a 1-on-1 chat with me to make sure you’re on track and still playing your own version of the being-brave game.
BUT KRISTEN THIS SOUNDS TERRIFYING.
That’s the idea! But there’s no safer place to face terror than in the company of people who are also choosing to be brave, right?
Brave will expand your sense of what’s acceptable, what’s reasonable, and what’s possible.
Who am I to talk about this stuff, you ask? Since 2008, I’ve: started and closed a profitable-but-boring-to-me photography business, held a 6-figure product launch, killed that $100k+ product because it didn’t light me up, left my husband, lost over $43,000 with a single business event, paid that $43,000 back, coached hundreds of people about business virtually, by phone, and in person, written 7 books (5 of which are available here), worked behind the scenes of 3 multi-million dollar businesses, gotten fired by my most profitable ghostwriting client, outed myself as a depressed entrepreneur, fallen in love, dyed my hair pink, and gotten 3 standing ovations at speaking gigs.
All that to say: I’ve done some awesome stuff and survived some fairly awful stuff while learning a shit-ton about being brave. I don’t have all the answers, but I’m deeply engaged in asking the right questions and answering them as best I can.
You’ll leave with a renewed and expanded sense of what’s possible, armed with a play-by-play calendar of your next six months.
You’ll also feel about 40 pounds lighter, having lost emotional baggage you didn’t even know you were carrying. Woot!
+ 2 days of workshop-y togetherness in Laguna Beach, California at Seven4one ($999 value)
+ 1-on-1 accountability call with me in May 2017 to make sure your Brave is still showing ($149 value)
+ Pre-Brave virtual Get Stoked party — Brave 101! — on March 28th, 2017 at 11am ET ($49 value)
+ Invitation to a pre-Brave taco throwdown on April 9th
+ Invitation to a post-Brave whale watching tour on April 12th
+ Assorted treats and surprises that I can’t tell you about just yet! ($72 value)
A $1,269 value, yours for $469 through 2.22.17.
We’ll meet at Seven4One in Laguna Beach, California, from 8am to 5pm on April 11 and 12, 2017, with optional activities (Tacos! Whale watching!) before and after the main event.
IS THERE A PAYMENT PLAN?
Yup! For $69 down, you can grab your seat today.
Then, it’s 3 monthly payments of $133.33 and you’re all paid up! (That totals $469 during the Early Bird rate, in case you’re all, FUCK MATH JUST TELL ME HOW MUCH IT IS.)
The Brave price increases by $100 — to $569 — on 2.23.17.
If you know you want something different, bigger, more meaningful, go be with Kristen. She will cut through the excuses you are making for yourself, help you overcome them, and teach you how hustle with a big damn heart and a whole lot of magic. You will leave her workshop with a clearer sense of self, a brighter purpose, and a very detailed plan on how to get where you are going. You'll be able to see a way forward that seems infinitely simpler than the one with all the roadblocks you were on before.
...this is really what working with you does, it makes me take the thing I've always known I wanted to use and dust it off and fucking use the thing.
I make my entire living off of the fact that almost no one can be brave enough to show up and be their authentic selves online. Kristen taught me how to do it. You're in good hands.
You make this dreamer girl in me believe beautiful things (and appreciate Board Meetings as much as orgasms).
You make me want to do brave things.
You completely brought ME out of my shell and helped me embrace my inner voice.
There isn’t one, baby — this is it!
HOW CAN I ATTEND ONLINE?
You can’t! The name of this game is bodies in the same room, breathing the same air and making eye contact. Until some Star-Trek-like teleportation device exists, we’ll have to settle for meeting in Laguna Beach.
HOW MANY SPOTS ARE THERE?
70-ish. Big enough to keep your costs under five hundred bucks, small enough to mean you don’t get totally lost in the crowd.
DO I HAVE TO OWN A BUSINESS TO COME?
Nope! Some parts of what we’re addressing are specific to owning a business, but the vast majority of our time together will address issues that plague almost every human on earth.
WHERE SHOULD I STAY?
I’ll send links to my favorite Laguna spots to buy a book, sleep, and eat once you’ve nabbed your ticket.
WHERE SHOULD I FLY INTO?
To scope out flights, you can fly into San Diego (SAN), Los Angeles (LAX), or John Wayne Orange County (SNA) and be in Laguna Beach within 70 minutes. SNA is closest, while LAX is likely to be cheapest.
Got a question? Hit me up using the form below!