We begin with a poem.
When people ask how I am, I don’t want my first response to be “Tired.”
And so I am undoing
my life’s ley lines
around wonder and silence
stillness and depth
I am deleting apps,
banishing the phone to the furthest corners
of the house.
I am tossing big plastic rings
at the dog, who chases them
and chews them
and likes to see if he can dangle from them
by his teeth for just a second
before his grip fails.
I am learning not-tired the same way:
dangling, just barely
by my teeth
But I am learning, nonetheless.
There’s a portion of asshole brain that I call Resting Bitch Voice. It’s like Resting Bitch Face, only this doesn’t just make you look like you’re pissed when you’re in the latest edition of People magazine.
Resting Bitch Voice keeps you tired, overworked, stressed, steeped in martyrdom, and unable to articulate exactly why you feel like a bag of old turds. (This is covered in far greater detail in That’s What She Said episode #251, which you can find at https://kristenkalp.com/resting-bitch-voice/)
First, Resting Bitch Voice makes you EARN rest.
Resting Bitch Voice will also pipe up about how you’re doing rest WRONG.
It says things like…
Why can’t you do all these tasks on this very long list and THEN rest?
Why can’t you rest MORE PRODUCTIVELY?
Why aren’t you working ahead when you know you have [ENORMOUS LIST OF THINGS] to do next week?
Why is the pandemic STILL making you tired?
Why can’t you just HANDLE YOUR SHIT without having to sleep, chill, ask for help, or unplug?
Ultimately, Resting Bitch Voice continuously conveys that it is NOT OKAY to be human.
It NEVER stops questioning your Very Human Limitations.
I’m not telling you about Resting Bitch Voice because this is easy work.
Rather, I’m talking about the mechanics of rest because it’s hard for me. My natural tendency is to WAKE UP AND DO SHIT UNTIL I DROP.
I had to learn that Resting Bitch Voice a.) exists and b.) can singlehandedly ruin my health when I listen to it.
How many hours of sleep and/or downtime would you get if you allowed yourself to be fully human?
What would regular rest and downtime look like if you let yourself be fully human?
What would you put down, leave behind, stop doing, or start prioritizing from an allowed-to-be-fully-human space?
If all you do in 2022 is learn to rest with less guilt and more joy, YOU’RE FUCKING WINNING.
If you’d like to be supported as you learn to rest, slow down, do less, and generally un-capitalism yourself as much as possible, I invite you to join me at The Imaginarium!
During these live, in-person workshops for the fully vaccinated in Philadelphia, we’ll take a look at every aspect of your life during pandemic. Then, we’ll vote many of the things that keep you burned out and stretched thin off the table so that you have more space for occupying and enjoying your life. Bonus: you’ll have three months after the workshop to form new habits and to explore the world of whatever comes after hustling yourself into the ground. You’ll do this work in the company of myself and up to 6 other rad humans.
To talk with me about attending, hit up bit.ly/talkwithkk and book a call! If you’d like to do this work privately – just me and you in Philly on the dates of your choosing – book a call and ask about Solo.
P.S. Related to learning to rest and find the sweetness even here, in the midst of pandemic: it doesn’t count if you don’t enjoy it.