for marketing like a mofo Archives - Kristen Kalp

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Stay on it. (That’s what she said.)

stay on it sales graphic

Today can we talk about why I hate selling stuff, even though part of my job is teaching people to sell stuff? I hate selling because you have to stay on it.

You have to keep selling and marketing far beyond the point where you feel any reasonable person would have purchased, bought, added to cart, or checked out.

When I like stuff, I buy it. Period. On sale, not on sale, 3 left, 37 left, don’t care.

The vast majority of people hem and haw and put off decision-making and “think about it” and ponder it and ask questions and talk to their friends about what they should buy and then, eventually, buy the thing at the last possible second or when the ‘deal’ runs out.

I’m still learning this after 8 years, and it’s still frustrating as hell, but I want to reiterate: most people hate making decisions and avoid them at all costs.  I truly think I’m broken in this department, since I’m mostly like, YUP NOPE no nuh-uh no way YEEESSSSS no no no no no no no no no no fuck yah.

This is what I’ve learned about this staying on it by carefully watching my own impatient tendencies and my peeps’ procrastinate-or-bust behaviors for years and years.

Stay on it rule #1: at LEAST 50% of sales come in at the last possible minute.

When I launched my Sales Without Shame program a few years ago, over 50% of the introductory sales came in during the final 48 hours of the offer. This time around, that procrastinators’ percentage for the Brave workshop Early Bird pricing ending was actually 83%. Had I not sent a series of ‘This is your last chance’ e-mails about Brave, I’d have missed out on 83% of sales.

In case your eyes are glazing over that number: EIGHTY. THREE. PERCENT. Of sales.

That means that if you want to move $1000 worth of product, failing to let your peeps know about a deadline means you’ll walk away with only $170. (That’s an exceptionally procrastination high percentage, but it points to a bigger issue.)

Continuing to push sales at the last minute is the hardest part of marketing by a long shot.

By the time your promotion or your next product/thingie/service/class is even announced, let alone coming to a close, you’re sick of talking about it. You’ve had to come up with seemingly endless ways to discuss your own best features and benefits, and you’re all out of buy-it-now-juice to sprinkle on your potential customers. I know.

But if the doors close at 2:00 p.m., plan on a deluge of action from 1:30 to 1:59 p.m.. Don’t give up and say your efforts aren’t working during the hours beforehand, like your asshole brain will tell you in order to keep you from sending that last e-mail or making that last post. Don’t let your peeps coast through the deadline without mentioning it many, many times.

Humans need deadlines and will naturally put off decision-making until they are forced to make a choice. Your repeated messages as the deadline approaches will naturally cause decision-making, and therefore sales.

If your doors never close — if you’re always perceived as available and capable of taking clients — potential clients don’t have this sense of urgency. They don’t have to hop on board or get in line because you haven’t given them any reason to do so.

Deadlines for promotions naturally regulate the flow of income to your business.

No promos? No deadlines? No one is beating down your 1:59 p.m. doors, since absolutely nothing happens at 2 p.m.. That probably means lower income for your business.

Stay on it rule #2: you can always try again.

Since I launched the Brave workshop at a time when actual, literal tenets of fascism were being introduced in my country — SURPRISE THE PRESIDENT HAS BEEN IN OFFICE FOR 48 HOURS IT’S ALREADY A SHIT SHOW — I got considerably less attention than I had planned with each marketing message I sent.

I could either a.) blame myself for being unable to rise above the collective dread, fear, and outrage sweeping through the nation, or b.) extend the timing of my offer and keep letting peeps know about what I had made and why it mattered.

Sometimes, events entirely outside of your control mean your promotion completely fails or you get precisely no attention when you had planned on hitting it out of the park. That doesn’t mean you give up and start over. That means you get creative. You can extend the offer, find a new way to talk about it, or start sending personal e-mails asking for help with promoting to your friends, one-by-one, who tell their friends, and you get your sales the painfully old-fashioned but incredibly effective way: by word of mouth.

For stay-on-it rules 3, 4, and 5, give the latest episode of That’s What She Said a listen.

Listen in, pick and choose episodes from the entire podcast right here, or subscribe in iTunes right here.

P.S.  You’re right, marketing sucks.  Make it better.

 

Stop Self Sabotage

If you’ve ever sabotaged the crap out of yourself, your work, your desires, your plans, or your waistline, this is the class for you.

I’ve shoved and pushed and stuffed everything I know about stopping self sabotage into a single hour-long class, then delivered it live so that peeps could ask questions and I could answer ’em.

In Stop Self Sabotage, you’ll learn:

+ the name for and nuances of what you’re feeling as the U.S. descends into an unparalleled political space — and why that matters for your sabotage-y bits
+ the single most important factor in stopping the sabotage-y habit
+ the four sneakier-than-a-wily-raccoon elements that conspire to undermine your best attempts at getting your work done
+ the everyday, seemingly insignificant acts that make all the difference to living a bigger, braver life
+ why ‘earning’ your play time is the worst idea ever (really, EVER)
+ 7 daily actions you can take to stop self sabotage

In not-bullet-point-y terms, that means I’ll shower you with everyday, simple ways to make sure you get your work done without spending another day saying you’ll start — and I quote — “tomorrow.”

We’ll take on your asshole brain, why you let clients or your peeps walk all over you and how you can get that shizzy to stop, how Trump has messed with my business after being in office for less than two weeks, and how ALL of it ties back to making stronger, firmer boundaries as you go about your days.

You can absolutely do the things you say you’re going to do and complete the work only you can create on this planet.  But you’ll have to get savvy to your own patterns and then change ’em.  The Stop Self Sabotage class can help. 😉

P.S. YUP, you’re running out of time to get yourself to the Brave workshop — so hop on over here and grab a seat if you wanna make it happen before Early Bird Pricing ends!

3 ways to actually love marketing (for real for real)

If you’ll kindly recall my slightly made-up but quite accurate modes of keeping business time from this That’s What She Said podcast, there are three types of time we have in every day.

Magic time, which is dedicated to doing the work that only you can do;
muggle time, which is dedicated to taking care of the physical world work that simply must be done;
and mogul time, the often-overlooked time in which you show the world your work and ask people of the world to buy it.

In this episode of That’s What She Said, we delve into not only routinely completing mogul time, but learning to actually love it.

I’ll take a guess at what’s keeping you from moguling in the first place, share ten starting points for your moguling practice, and throw down with kind-but-honest, practical-but-potentially-painful observations about what why you might hate marketing your business right now.

Also: castles! Angry alligators! Snail mail! Listen in to get the most practical, simple, and effective marketing advice I’ve given in years.

P.S. If you wanna get better at marketing, you’ll need a marketing calendar, an e-mail list, and a free copy of Go Your Own Way. Go get ’em!