The Order of the Phoenix isn't just fiction. - Kristen Kalp

The Order of the Phoenix isn’t just fiction.

order of the phoenix bio photo

Owning your own business while the rest of the world goes off to a 9 to 5 is lonely. It’s even lonelier when your brain tells you no one wants what you have to offer but you wake up and do your work anyway. It’s lonely to live without a dynamic group of interesting maker-people in your neck of the woods, even if you’re an introvert or a hermit (or both).

Dispelling the inherent loneliness of bringing your best work into the world is one of the most vital steps we can take toward wholeness right now.  Because whatever comes next, personally or politically, not one of us can solve it, fix it, or change it alone.  (DAMMIT I’VE TRIED AND IT APPEARS THAT WE NEED EACH OTHER.)

The resistance takes all of us, and community is the start.

Maybe you’re lucky enough to have a giant group of artistic and entrepreneurial friends who live within a few miles of you, but I’m not so lucky.

I want to enter into community with you. Living, vital, raucous, sometimes-pain-in-the-ass-because-we-disagree community. Talks on the phone (reluctantly) and lives into the questions and weeps at tragedies and takes action together community. Feels all the feels and is just fine with that community. Learning together community. Sharing resources and ideas community. Actual gives a shit about one another even though it’s vulnerable community.

The Order of the Phoenix starts now.

As a member, you’ll get an extra That’s What She Said podcast episode each month, plus a live Order of the Phoenix call to resist the forces of gross, ick, and apathy that are attacking each of us on a daily basis.  No matter where you live, you’re facing unparalleled battles for your time, attention, and energy, and these live monthly calls are the perfect reason to bring your attention back to your priorities.  They’re also a fantastic opportunity to ask me anything related to life or business — you can submit questions in advance! — and are recorded for those who can’t make it.  Finally, you’ll have access to a handful of my freshest poems each month, long before they make their way to the interwebs or into a new book.

You get podcasts, poems, and fresh perspective for 8 bucks a month.

Patreon bonus podcasts
For signing up before April 5th, you’ll also have two only-available-for-the-first-30-days bonus podcasts waiting for you! Joy is an Act of Resistance and How to Hermit Without Breaking Your Life are waiting when you hop on board.

Why this, and why now? Making true, beloved community is faaaaaar riskier than making laser-focused one-problem-solving programs, which are easier to market and much more likely to lead to 5 and 6-figure launches. I’ve done that already, but at this point I don’t want to sell a bundle of information that allows for holing up with a screen and going it alone.

I’m so, so tired of going it alone.  I want to find reasons to hold potlucks with you and talk to you and laugh with you and help you and simply be with you, wherever you are. (Not metaphorical potlucks. Actual potlucks with actual casserole dishes in actual homes and hillsides and meeting spaces around the globe.)

Let’s make a joyful resistance that focuses on taking damn good care of ourselves, our talents, and our fellow humans.

Let’s refuse to listen to the voices that say we can’t, or to our own asshole brains that say we’re too lazy/stupid/fat/useless/[insert insult here] to achieve much of anything.

Let’s make something new together: a true community of artists and makers, thinkers and doers, sensitive peeps and empaths who are in it for the long haul.

Let’s bring the Order of the Phoenix from the pages of fiction into real life.

Join the Order of the Phoenix for $8 a month.

Become a Patron!

Want a free workshop, program, or both? Here’s how the group goals work!

When we reach $500 a month, you get two extended podcasts each month instead of just one!

When we reach $2000 a month, everybody gets free access to M-School, my magic school for entrepreneurs. It’s valued at $199 and is massively beneficial for your business whether you’re a Harry Potter fan or not. 😉

When we reach $4000 a month, everybody gets an invite to a free in-person half-day workshop. I’ll record it for everyone who can’t make it in person, too!

At $6,300 a month, everybody gets an invite to a free in-person full-day workshop. Again, for $0.00. Just because you’re playing along, and with recordings for all!

At $8,300 a month, I’ll create a full-on program of YOUR choosing. I’ll solicit ideas and build out a multi-week, full-throttle, should-be-thousands-of-dollars-class based on what you (and the others!) want most. Then give it to all current members.

The higher we go in the fee structure, the more completely dedicated I can be to this community, and the more each member gets in return. Membership fees will pay my salary, my business expenses, and for my days off so that I can refill and be an actual human in the offline world. Eventually, your fees will pay for travel so that I can meet you, as well as workshop rentals and hosting and programming and swag bags and snail mail and my accountant, Karl, and his crew of people who are good with numbers and make me sign official documents in a timely fashion. Most importantly, the fees will pay for me to make glorious things while focused on just one group of people — you and your fellow members of OoP — without being distracted by having to hustle some other creation(s) in order to pay the bills.

Join the Order of the Phoenix for $8 a month.

Become a Patron!


P.S. While I was writing this, a small child wandered over to my cafe table and waved his straw/wand at me. We have the blessing of the wizards, people.

P.P.S. Nab 1 of the 10 $88 spots if you’d like access to my rotating program archive (valued at thousands, woot!) and a 15-minute 1-on-1 coaching call each month. YUP that’s a steal and YUP those spots will go fast and YUP I assure you that 15 minutes is long enough to let in a miracle. 😉

Become a Patron!

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